Brace Yourself!!

Secret Number Twenty-Seven: I think my toes look like french fries.

I'm waiting for the best friends to get over, so I'm cleaning like the nerd that I am. I blame my mother for this need-to-clean that's embedded in my skin; she's the hugest clean freak I know.

Well, today was errands day. I sweated it out in the heat, buying stuff for the wedding shower next Saturday. I felt slightly bad, because I ended up taking a whole shelf of mason jars at Hobby Lobby. I instantly regretted grabbing a basket instead of a cart, because I then had to waddle around the store and make funny, pained faces down every aisle. I'm pretty excited to get started on the decorations, but I still have more to buy.

I ended up relocation Frank again into the house to chill on a plastic McDonald's plate by our living room window, because I couldn't take the stress anymore. I think he likes it.

The World is Ours, Ours for the Moment...

Secret Number Twenty-Six: I love Starbucks' Green Tea Latte with soy milk, but concerned with what it may be doing...should it be this green?

I don't know if it's my paranoia, or horrible lack of luck, but I think Frank is getting worse. I don't know where to put him, since my parents didn't believe in putting a cover over our terribly small patio. Probably because it's so small and no one goes out there but my pee-filled dogs, but still. Frank has no safe place to perch. I'm starting to see through some parts of his little, hardly-got-a-chance-to-grow leaves...and a new Frank along the way, unless I can discover a new place.

So, my sister's wedding is coming fast, and her wedding shower is in just a week. I'm donating an entire paycheck to buy decorations and wedding gifts tomorrow. Sadly, I have the same amount in my savings as before the summer; I've been working full-time. Ah, well. It happens. Gotta learn how to not obsessively spend.

Thank God it's Friday, as of thirty-nine minutes...forty minutes ago.

"I swear I'll make it right, just give me one more night; it sucks we all go home, if not we sing along..."

You've Got Designer Shades to Hide Your Face..

Secret Number Twenty-Five: I like my hair better when it's messy.

So, I hurt Frank. :( I checked on him yesterday morning before work, and got worried because the sun was already directly on him at ten in the morning. Being naive, I shrugged it off, thinking the sun would move soon.
I was wrong.
I came home from work at six, and little Frank had these painful looking spots on his little leaves. I wanted to cry, and poured more water into his pot to make up for it. I think he's a little angry with me. I did move him though to avoid more sunburning. He now chills under our grill. Maybe I'll sing to him later...I heard that singing helps plants grow.

Life keeps slapping me on the face, and I'm thankful to God for it. I keep realizing more things I need to work on, and it's exciting and scary all at once. But, I'm gonna keep going. Just keep running, and keep my eyes looking up.

I'm watching Ellen right now, because I got today off for a college convention that I didn't even end up going to, and I'm in total bliss. I'm obsessed with Ellen DeGeneres. Obsessed. I've had daydreams about hanging out with her, and being her BFF (Damn you, Paris Hilton), and being on her show. Every time she comes on her show and says something about her being in a magazine, I go and buy it. She's awesome.

Well, I'm going to go sneak into my awesome sister's apartment pool (with permission).

"I'm fallin, I'm fallin, I'm fallin for you..oh darling it's finally true."

I need you now more than I needed you then...

Secret Number Twenty-Four: I dream about you every night, and wake up sad.

So, it's been..one month and one week, since the boyfriend and I broke up. Don't really want to talk about it, but I'm trying to leave him alone and grow in myself.
I've gained a lot of peace with my life, and my past, and myself. Now I'm trying to regain a strong relationship with God. It surprises even myself, because I always thought I'd end up atheist...but a part of me wants to try again. And with Cody gone, this is my chance. My chance to grow into myself, and rediscover God. If he comes back eventually, great. I'll be a better person, and we'll be happier. If not...well...okay. I really don't want to think about that right now.

So, for AP Bio, we have to grow a plant. We had the choice between a begonia and a Coleus, which is an ugly, boring, leafy plant. Following the girl in me, I chose the begonia. So, today I went to lunch with a youth leader who is awesome and I'm gonna meet with her every week, and then went to Lowe's. I walked in all cool in my Pink cop glasses, and realized I'd never find the friggin thing by myself. So, I grabbed this young, smiley guy, and followed him around as he picked me out a pretty plant, food, and a pot. Proud of myself, I strolled out to my car with all my trinkets and named the plant Frank. I've never grown a plant before, and my mother has a black thumb...she kills everything she tries to grow...so naturally I'm a little scared that when I walk into Bio, I'll be holding a pot with a sad, desolate and black little shrub. So, as I tucked Frank into the passenger seat and fasten the seat belt around his small little pot, I promised to try not to let him die.

I'm not sure if we're supposed to log about our plants, but Frank is my new friend, so I'll include him into my blogs for now on...that no one reads. Oh well, it helps to vent. :)

So, off I go into my new life with a manly little flower at my side. Look out, world.

"she keeps a picture of me...in her apartment in the city. Somethings in this world man just don't make sense. "